Sexual Harassment Stories and Experiences

Monica, Texas

     Maybe the following is someone else’s story as well, if so ….My prayers, empathy, and friendship are there for you.

     I was lonely on a verge of a divorce; I became a friend of a man who was 12 years older than me. He listened to me (I thought), was so concerned with my issues. He called me daily and I saw the “over concern” and told him I appreciated a friend when I needed one. I ask him to back off, it was wrong and I had to figure out my issues without him. There was not an “us” at all then.

     The stalker started calling my home twenty times a day, called my work just as many. He would hang up on everyone. At that time, I was so weak and I needed it to stop…The way to stop the mental abuse on my family and co-workers was to do what he said…. talk to him on the phone and developed this relationship…if I didn’t ….Well NO one would believe we had only talked and were just friends. (According to him) Every single time I tried to remove myself from his clutches, he would leave horrible messages on my children’s phone and at my work. He would call and shoot a gun in my ear and tell me how much he loved me and this was my entire fault. I was the only one that could stop him and that meant doing what he said. I can not tell you how many times my car had key marks on it or damage was done to the inside of my car. The stalker super glued my ignition. He fed off my fear of him and others knowing.

     I finally did go through a divorce and began to get stronger. Once, I was out on my own, my stalker became more violent. I also got strong enough to start calling the police. The stalker has followed me to and from work, threatened to kill my children, tried to run me off the road with or without my children. He threatened me with a gun. He took the same gun into my friends work and made threats. He watched my house night and day. He came into my work…just to show me he could. I made police report after police report. He was finally arrested and will be off probation in September 2005. He was an employee of a city agency. We ask for him to be removed from the streets and put on “desk” duty…he was using their vehicle to harass me. …nothing. We sued the city and lost the lawsuit. The only thing I accomplished by suing them was the stalker was fired at that time. The city would not take responsibility for not taking him out of his city vehicle. They would not take action against him, until I sued.

     Where am I today? Tough question!!!! Some days I am great, some days I am horrible. I quit my job, because of fear he would go on a shooting spree. I work from home now, making very little income or none. I worry every day…. is this the day he will seek revenge or is something going to happen. I am learning to live again, but it is a slow process. I am slowly becoming active again, but with saying that: I can have “trigger” and regress back two steps. But, I refuse to give the stalker any more of my life. If I could say anything to anyone of you who is living this: Do not hide the abuse!!! Your stalker will grow and thrive off of it. Document everything. Do not be like I was hiding scars and pain. Ashamed you could have possibly let this happen. I thought I was protecting my family and me. I wasn’t! My stalkers ACTIONS are not my fault. HE owns those. He is a sick, insecure individual who only survives by sucking the life out of others. Control of others is his oxygen.

This entry was posted on Wednesday, August 3rd, 2005 at 10:49 am and is filed under Effects of Sexual Harassment, Stalking, Health Effects. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.