Sexual Harassment Stories and Experiences

 Nickii, New York   

     I’m an educator. What really disturbs me is my employers didn’t believe one woman when she filed a complaint against the man who later harassed me.  Then after she left, I was assigned to work with the harasser. My employer put me in a  terrible position, I feel.

     It only took him 1 month before he started  to grab and hug me against my will–not friendly hugs, he would grab me and press his body hard against mine.  It was unwelcome and inappropriate.  

     I told the harasser not to hug me in that manner.  But he continued to “sneak and grab” me when we talking face-to-face.

     One time he kissed me on the cheek as he was holding me in a bear-hug against my will.  Another time he told me,” Mommy, you’re the kind of woman that I need to be with ’cause you are nice-looking.  I know you make a decent salary, no kids.”  

     After I made the complaint about him, my female co-workers were very angry with me; they’re all married w/ children and so is the harasser.  I’m  unmarried and child-free. Therefore, in their minds, I should have dealt with it-it’s a part of being a woman, an attractive and friendly woman.  I can deal with that.

     What I couldn’t deal with was the unsatisfactory evaluations I received following my complaint. The administrator who gave me these evaluations was friendly with the harasser, and from the same  country. The harasser was counting on the administrator to help him secure his tenure.

     So after 8 years of satisfactory evaluations, I now have 3 Unsatisfactory evaluations. I’m tenured, but it’s not right.  

     I filed a informal complaint with the EEOC and waiting for their response.  I am upset about those evaluations and don’t trust my employer.  Being tenured, they just can’t get rid of me without just cause and expense.

     I’ve been harassed before, and feel sad, mad, alone-wondering why this is happening to me again.  Two of the harassers are married and the other one lives with his girlfriend.  So I don’t understand their actions.  I made it very clear that I’m not interested.  My male friends/family feel that I’m a target because I am unmarried.  So I’m up-for-grabs.

     Despite everything, I continue to pray-for the harasser and all the players involved.

This entry was posted on Saturday, August 18th, 2007 at 12:14 pm and is filed under Sexual Harassment in the Workplace, Retaliation, Backlash, and Victim-blaming. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.