Sexual Harassment Stories and Experiences

Kellie, Michigan    

     In late 2004, my brother-in-law was deployed to Iraq.  About four months later, left he began calling my house, making disgusting requests.

     He started out saying that my sister thought that she and I could pose for nude photos…she could send him her photos and I could give my husband mine.  Next, he suggested that, when he got back from Iraq, he, my sister, and I could get together and have a three-way. He also proposed I have sex with him sometime.

     I refused all of these requests, and for a month I would not answer the phone.

     A month later I picked up the phone without checking the caller ID first and it was my brother-in-law. Right away, he asked me again about having nude photos taken. I again refused.

     He also told me how my husband confided in him about our sex life, and that my husband was unhappy. When I didn’t believe him and told him so.  Then he said  he’d walked in on me when I was in the shower. (This was another lie as I always lock the door.)

     I was so disgusted and angered I hung up on him and never again answered the phone without checking caller ID.  

     When he came home from Iraq, I was afraid for not only my safety, but also that of my daughter. I refused to allow him to be near her or alone with me. Fortunately nothing happened once he was home.

     He was once again deployed for in September of this year. I was afraid that he’d start in again on me.

     On 10/20 he did. It started with an email that simply said “Hey sis how ya doing?”

     I thought it was from my sister, so I answered it with an honest update about my family.

     The response I got back was very lewd.  It asked me to take nude  pictures of myself and send them to my brother-in-law. An hour later there was  another email stating that I needed to send them within 2 days. And then within a few hours there were 2 more emails asking me to please answer the first 2.

     I opened the first one at work and was instantly upset by the content.  I emailed back and demanded to know who it was and let them know that the request was disgusting and unwanted.

     He emailed me back and confessed to sending the email. He also apologized for sending the email and then inquired about the request. I told him no and that I would ban my sister’s email account if he didn’t stop. He promised that he would.

     This morning he emailed me with the measurements of his penis and wanted me to tell him if I thought that it was small, large or huge.

     I have told him repeatedly that I don’t like what he’s doing and to stop. I have told him to get help.  I have threatened to tell his wife what he’s doing. I don’t want to hurt my sister by getting him tossed from the Army, but at the same time I can’t have him doing this to me either. 

     I have spent since the 22 of this month trying to pretend that everything is all right while I’m at work and trying my hardest not to cry. I feel so degraded and humiliated by what he’s doing and the fact that no matter what I say to him seems to sink in.  He just won’t stop. He knows that it makes me angry and that its uncomfortable for me.  I am afraid that one day he’s going to get tired of me telling him no, and either come after me or my daughter or take my rejections out on his family.

     My husband knows what is going on and is just as upset, and unsure of what to do. My parents know, and also do not know what to do.  As far as I know, my younger sister, this man’s wife, does not know what is going on.

     My brother-in-law sees no problem with what he’s doing and only does this when his wife can’t find out about; like when he’s in Iraq. My sister lives in with no family near by to help her to deal with the fall-out from this.  And it just feels as if the rest of my family is just as upset and unsure of what to do as I am.  

This entry was posted on Monday, November 12th, 2007 at 2:38 pm and is filed under Sexual Harassment in Miscellaneous Settings, Effects of Sexual Harassment, Stalking. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.