Do you want to have a secret?
Anonymous, Canada
My son had been sick and was staying with my mother and stepfather for a few days. When my mother had to go to my great aunt’s funeral, I went to pick up my son though I stayed over for one night.
When it was time to head to bed, my stepfather carried my son to their bed. I went and climbed into the guest bed.
After I had drifted off to sleep, I was awoke by my stepfather rubbing the side of my leg/butt.
He said to me, “Do you want to have a secret?”
I heard in my mind, “Do you want to have a cigarette?” Why would I want a cigarette?
Then he said it again. “Do you want to have a secret? Do you want to do it?”
I jump out of bed and went in to check on my son. He followed and then wanted me to climb into bed with the both of them.
I left my son sleeping and went back to my bed, leaving my stepfather the impression that I WAS NOT interested.
I didn’t sleep a wink that night, concern about myself and my son. What do I do? Do I tell my mother?
I’m 36 years-old. I didn’t do anything with him. Yet I am still burdened with a secret.
I am so sorry this happened to you. As someone also abused by family, I empathize completely with the burden these secrets can have. It helps a lot to be able to tell someone what has been done to us.
We hear about sexual propositions/abuse of children and teenagers by family members. But most people don’t know that this happens often to adults, too. At SHS, we hear a new story like this every couple of months. Uncles and family members not related to the victim by blood seem to be the most common culprits (step parents and grandparents, in-laws, etc.) These men seem completely oblivious to the evil of what they do. They really do think it’s some kind of neat, naughty secret that can be a form of bonding. Very sick. –Jennifer